9/11/2010;3.15am

Today is Tuesday 3.15am. I am still awake. What keep me awake? What happen on me? Why I cant sleep? Do I know the problem? I guess I know it. Too much of worries. What do I worry about?

My CIM assignment. Why do I worry about it? All this because the due date is coming yet I have done nothing yet. How this could happen? Still last minute work. I hate the feeling. But still like to do thing last. Never learn from mistake.

Second worry is money. All this because of the school fees. CIM and UCSI fees are coming. Worry will be too burden to my parents. Just worry worry and worry. If keep worry bout today how to make it for tomorrow. Even I understand this but, the worry still there.

Third worry is bout the tuition job. Now I am considering to continue or not. Not really happy to work there. Besides, I have no enough time to study after I take the tuition. Now I have known my limit. There is a limit for me.

I really feel blur now when think of my future. Don’t know how will it be. Then indirectly it become a stress for me. Please, give me a direction. Tell me where to go.

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My short semester

My holiday just started from today, 20/10/2010. Yesterday was my big day. My final exam. This semester was a short semester.So, I only took International Business and Corporate Communication.

I thought it will be an easy going semester, but thing happen on the other way. This semester is one of the toughest semester I ever have. But all this because I want to and I have changes this semester. But not on my expectation yet. At least I have made my first move.

The changes is because my last semester experience. My MA2 has taught me a lesson. The other is because of my friends in UCSI. They help me a lot in my changes. Because now i have people to study with. Thanks to CK , Da Shao, Joey, Jason, Queen, Kok Meng, Alvin, Ken, Bee Loo, Jaddinee, Men Chun who have studied with me. Especially Queen and Da Shao, they have helped me a lot in my International Business subject. Even some are not taking the same subjects with me, but their companions mean a lot for me. I learn this from last semester and this semester. Is fun to study and know them. Hope will continue the fun next semester.

In this semester I only focus on my IB and not focus on the CC. So, I hope that my CC final will be able to pass. Even this semester is one the stress semester but this is also one of my happiest semester. I have achieved my objective even it is just 50%.

This semester, I did not finish my assignment in last minute. This is what I always ask myself to do in every semester but never made it. This semester I have done it. Even though the work was not that good. But at least there is changes. Next semester I will keep it up and change my working attitude. I feel sorry to my group member that made them feel like they did not contribute much on the IB assignment. But I really thanks for you guys support me when we were doing assignment. This was the first time I do assignment with friends. It is really fun and enjoyable. I will to do better next time in group assignment.  Thanks to CK and Edward who have given me very good advice on how to deal with group assignment.

I would like to thank to CK for his help on helping me do the alignment. The assignments that I have done in this semester were the best I have ever done. I have learn a lot in this semester when worked with CK, Edward, Shy Chuan, Kok Meng and Da Shao ( MP assignment). I do not think I will learn that much in my work place. I really benefit a lot from them. Hope will meet a second chance to learn as well in next semester.

Another achievement of mine is, I do not have to study overnight in last minute before exam. Even it only happen on my IB, I still studied last minute on my CC. But, I will not give up and try to make it better next semester. I did not prepare for my IB before exam and my mind at that time was very calm. I really enjoy the moment I watched Naruto. I have made it and I will keep it next semester. Do what I want before exam.

I really thanks to my friends who support me and be with me during my stress time. Thanks to you guys. I almost changed to another guy. Almost became a mark base guy. This is not what I want to be. All because of the IB. But I have returned to my own self 3 days before exam. A playful and not a mark concern guy. Always be who I am. Hope my friends will not hate me because of my idiots attitude. But, that is what I want to be.

 

 

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The Story of “White Crow”

Last month was the independence month. Same thing happened as last month. Racist issue again. Was it because the Malay was too free to make trouble? When the independence day approached, we would hear the Malay asked the Chinese back to China or Indian and Chinese are immigrant or more and more harsh things. Those words were mostly came from high educated person like ministers, headmaster or mistress, etc. With the existence of these idiots how can our country improve or develop. Above are all racist issues. I am not going to discuss about that. I am tire to hear all of these. I just want to tell a short story about the “White Crow” This story is told by my friend.

This story is about a crow who is envy the white birds. Crow is black and people don’t like black as the believe black carries bad luck. Besides, in fairy tail stories crow is the pet that feed by bad people. Therefore, eventually crow gives a bad impression to people. People will chase it away when sees it. Throw stone to it. Yet, not only human dislikes crow, the birds dislike it as well. So, the crows are all live together and not mix with other group.

Therefore, there is a crow who like to change its fate. It thinks of why doesn’t he change into the white species of bird instead of just stay what it is now?  So, he fly, fly and fly to find solution to changes it colour into white. One day, he found a painter is painting a building with a white paint. Without think twice, he dip himself into the paint. And it is work. He manage to change himself into a white crow.

After he turn into white, he really thought his likability will increase. He fly to white birds group. He wants to hang with them and leave his old clan. But when he approaches the white birds nest, he isn’t being welcome by them. The white birds are chasing him away. And say that” you are crow, even you are white. You are not a part of us. Back to your own crow family. Go away, we don’t like you.” So he leaves the group and goes to the city searches for food. He thought that people will like him when he is in white. But thing happens on the other way. When people see him, they feel shock to see a white crow and chase him away. No body wants white crow. In the end, he flies back to his family. But, when the crows see him, they chase him away as well and say: ” this is the place for crow, not for you white bird. You are not welcome, get out of here” So now he has become a stray white bird that belong to no body. No one likes him, no one accept him, no one welcome him. Till the end of his life, he just a lonely white crow.

In this story, you can view it in different perspective. Since I am talking about racist issue, I will relate it into the issue. As I am the Chinese in Malaysia, I will use Malaysia Chinese as example.

The white crow in the story just like my ancestor. He would like to has new life in foreign country. Because that time China was in chaos. Corruption in the Qing dynasty government. People lived in fear. So, at that period of time many Chinese have migrated to others countries for support their family. Most of the Chinese were went to other countries as a miner. In Malaysia was as a tin miner.This is just a short brief about how Chinese come to Malaysia.

The reason the Chinese came here by being tricked. Most of the Chinese came here as a coolie. We came here because the local lazy and didn’t want to do all those mining hard work. And at that period of time, China has skilled in mining. So, I assume that we were asked to come for the mining industry.

When we came to Malay State (the name of peninsula before Malaysia is form), we not only made money for own and sent back to China. What we did in here indirectly developing the country economy. But, were the contribution appreciated? I guess no.

It is already more than 100 years Chinese leave in Malaysia. Or I should say since the emperor of Melaka, Princess Hang Li Poh married to the sultan of Melaka. There is also rumor spread around that the Four Melaka Warriors were Chinese, they are Hang Tuah, Hang Jebat, Hang Likur and Hang ( I ve forgotten ). Anyway it is just rumor, not have been proven yet.

Anyway, above about a short brief of how Chinese came to Malaysia. And for now, what we shall concern is present. Back to the white crow story, can the white crow back to his crowd? No, he has been eliminated from his family. This apply to us who has been far away from China.

Here, is a story of mine on how the China people look on the Malaysian Chinese. In my work place I meet a lot of China people who come for visit. There was an old China Lady asked me how the life in Malaysia. I said not bad. Later I was surprised by her words. What she said was, the Chinese in here are live in high standard of life. don’t need to work and can enjoy life in here. Not only her think that, I’ve met quite a lot of China people who think like that.

Below is the story of my grandma when she visited her China relative. When she got there, she was treated like a “water fish”. She paid for all the expenses on those days she visited. Is that the way we treat our relative or guest? That is because in most of their mind, Chinese in Malaysia are rich. Once, I’ve heard from the conversation between my mum and my grandma. The conversation was about the letter from a far relative from China. The content was asked us to finance them in build their new house. What does that mean? Are we here who live in Malaysia are money tree for them?

So, can the Malaysian Chinese return to China? The answer is no. The way we live are different. We have been used to this place. This is the place we born and been raised up. So it is not fair to ask us leave.

It is nothing wrong to ask the Chinese back to China, but before say that please think about the feeling of being chase away.  If you want to chase us back to China, please do it back to 100 years ago. Not now. You should stop the crow from change into white crow, not kill him after he changed into white bird.

To all the people around the world, please take the white crow story as your reminder. Do not racist on other race in your country. Not their fault to be in your country. All these are the mistake that made by our ancestor.

Your ancestor should chase the outsider away from entering your country. But, because of the uselessness of ancestors the outsider were asked to work in other country. (not apply in every country, certain country)

Next, the people should be blamed is the ancestors who migrated to other countries. Why cant you endure the poor situation? Why????

In the nutshell, there is not conclusion in the story and this racist issue. It has been existed for more than 1000 years.

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Trip with friends

Today is 20th August 2010, Friday. My Uni friends and I went to Taman Pertanian Negara for a cycling activity today. The friends who participated in the activities were CK, Da Shao(Hui Ming), Bee Yong, C.Queen, Kok Meng, Jason, Men Chun, Hwa Li, Yan, Shu Yau, Joey and Ken.

At 7.30am we met each other at outside our Uni campus. We drove from Cheras to Shah Alam. We reached the place at around 8.40am. All because of the traffic jam. Yet, thanks to the jam we actually have spent some time because the place only open at 9.00am.

When we got there, we almost got disappointed because we were told that one of the cycle shop is not open on Friday and the other one not sure. Since we already there we just bet on the other one which might opened at around 10.00am.

While waiting we were sitting at the cafe or canteen and chit chatting to spend our precious time. Then we took a bus ride have a sight view. The bus driver was drove quite fast and we were not really view much thing. As waiting for the time to pass till 10.am we planned to take the bus ride for few trips. But, we were lucky because the shop was just opened after we took one ride.

Then we went to pick our bicycle. Mine was not that good because the gear was not function nicely. To test the right gear I had wasted my stamina before we started. My stamina is getting poorer as well because lack of exercise for these few years. That why my weight has gained up to 65kg.

Everyone of us was doing well at the beginning, but some started to get complained and stopped when went to uphill. It was not easy to cycle uphill. It requires a lot of stamina. Among us Jason, Ck and Kok Meng were strong. Can’t compare with them. I was enjoy the downhill part. Because of my bike brake was not that good, it made me more excited when went downhill at full speed. That was fun and great. I am tire now so not much explanation about this trip. Lazy…

After the cycling, we went to Puchong Tesco to take our lunch at Sushi King. Then we backed to our home after that…. Well due to tiredness and laziness I keep all thing short and simple…

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Her life

Just saw the photo of her and him in Facebook. It is very sweet and lovely. On the moment I saw those photo, there was a pain came from my heart. It is not easy to let go somebody indeed.

Thanks to her reply that help me put down the stone in my heart which has bothered me for 3 years. Yet, I still thinking of her everyday. I don’t know what can I do to stop thinking of her.

I will always think of the time when I with her in school. Always peek or look at her back from my sit. There was once she asked why I always look at her. I just answered that I was looking in front. But the answer in my heart is I like you so I look at you. A lot of memory about her in my memory. But this is just one side memory.

Wish her and him will last long. Wish him will protect her and love her till the end of the life.

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Uni Life Stage 2

This is the continue of my yesterday blog. I have stopped at Da Shao. Now I will continue to talk about Shy Chuan (long jie or dai kar jie). She is the big sister of us. Everyone scare her, I guess. She is totally different than she looks. An active girl. She always treat me like a overactive boy. I am not sure do I really look like that.Cannot say much bad thing about her. Otherwise, my mark will be deducted if she find out.

The next person is Jason. The friend I know in Business Research Method class. He is a very skinny guy. Mrs James always says he looks like her brother-in-law. He always come to school very very early. And he knows a lot of nice and cheap stuff in the school area. So anyone who like to know where can get economical food, you can look for him.

Joey, is group member in Business Information System. The only word that can use to describe her is cute. Well, all because of the height. No comment on people height because I am a shorty too. She is a very nice friend. She plans a lot of activity for us. Without her, I don’t think I will have a chance to stay over night with friends at outside. Genting trip was my first trip with uni friends stay over night and know more about them.

Men Chun I know him in the Business Communication class. I wasn’t close with him at first. Get to know more about him is on this semester. He is a nice to mix with. A good navigator. Want to know shortcut in Cheras, you can look for him. He can cook as well. So for girls, if you are looking guys who can cook, he can be your first choice. Handsome and good in cooking.

About Shu Yau, I think this is the correct spelling. For me, she is a cool girl. Most of the time is quite. Seldom talk. But I was surprise when I heard that she is very good in negotiating. She is a good house wife. So, for guys who looking for good negotiator wife, you can look for her. I think she will kill me after she see this.

Ken, as talkative as me. His full name I am not so sure. Because on the first day I know him, I already call  him Ken. What i know bout him is he is a theory guy. Talk a lot of theory. No comment because I am talkative too.

Wayne is a helpful friend. Even I have never hang out with him but he really help me a lot. I do not how to thank him. Every information he knows he will tell me. I don’t think I am this kind of friend after all.

About Yoyo, the word that suit her is clumsy. Always lost her handset. She is a very funny and helpful girl. Any problem, you can look for her. She is very good in preparing sausage as well. I like the way she cut the sausage. I laugh non stop when the first time I saw the sausage that cut by her.

About Yan and Sook Fong, I just knew them this semester. They are very nice too. Friendly and sharing person. This is what I know about them. Any bad comment about them please inform me and comment here.

About Cai Jing, I am not know her much as well because never same class with her. Just hang out with her few times. What I know about her is that she likes to take photo of herself. She always take CK’s handset and take her own photo. She should join contest. And i think she will win the contest if she take part. I enjoy the day played badminton with her.

Anyone else do I left out? If not this is all about my Uni life. The end….

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Uni life

This semester is my year 2 semester 3. I entered the University in September 2008. Due to the financial constraint I exercise study and work. Therefore, for me university life was bored. Because for the begin of my study, I just went to University on time and backed after the class ended. No university social life at that period of time. But at that time I have already known Wayne and Chin Yi at the Financial Accounting class and Christina and Mei Yen at the CMA class. Yet, we were just assignment member. But is lucky to know them as without them I couldn’t do my group assignment.

I started to have university life was during May 2009. All thanks to Bee Loo (Mrs Gue), I knew her at the Fundamental of Marketing class. From her I get to know Hui Ming (Da Shao), Jaddinnee (Mrs James) and Yoyo. Most of the time I would hang out with them. But just in the campus. They are very very nice friends. Sweet and friendly. My first experience on making pasta or spaghetti was with them. That was nice and tasty because I involved in made it.

Later on I got to know CK, Kok Meng, Wai Hoong, Shy Chuan (Long Jie), Shu Yau, Joey, at the Business Information System class. At that we weren’t that close because I wasn’t really approached them. We all gathered together all because of assignment. Be with them also my first time serious in doing the assignment. But it seem to give them pressure when I was serious. I hope they do not feel regret to group with me. After all we were one of the best group in the class.

During my short semester I know them more and  I know one more friend who is Edward (genius) from CK. All of them have nice and fun characteristic. I feel comfort when be with them. CK, Edward and Kok Meng are quite close in class. It is funny to see how they mix together. That the university life the students should have. Not just stick with the book and work for result. Kok Meng is sort of this kind of person but not always stick with the book. He has aim or target in his result. It is good to have aim to work on, better than me who is just fool around with my study. But, as friends, we are worry about him especially CK. He will depress when he get poor result on his mid term and assignment. Just like what happen today, he got unexpected result on Management Accounting 2 and Taxation 1. But thing had over after CK talked to him. A kind of emotional person. He is a fun and nice guy.

About CK he is a nice guy. That is for sure. I don’t think anyone will say he is a bad guy. But if you ask people about me, I can tell you, I am a bad guy (always from long jie). He always helps friends in need. And he is a smart guy too. Any problem in study can go to him. That why he always circle by girls.

About Edward, he is quite cool and independent. He always walk on his own if he doesn’t want to join our plan (lunch). He is sharp on words too. So don’t mess with him or you will get shoot till your body have a lot of holes. But he is helpful as CK too. Any problem on your study can look for this genius as well.

About Jad, she is handbags fever. She likes bags and her boyfriend, James. Every times mention about him, her face will turn red just like a tomato. She has an interesting family too. I am very enjoy when listen to her talk about her and her family’s life. It is totally different than my family. She is a genius too. Study last minute and score an A. Can you do it?

Bee Loo (Mrs Gue), I know her since Jan 2009 semester. Nice girl and fun to disturb. Mr Gue is her first boyfriend and we wish he will be the last boyfriend as well. She is a tidy type of person which totally oppose from me. That why she always comments on my attire.

Hui Ming (Da Shao), is a cute girl. Very helpful person. Helpful till like a robot. She can do thing nonstop like the time we have party at her house. Curious type girl, I guess. Thanks to her I did well on my Management Accounting 1 and Financial Accounting 2. She is a nice partner to look for group study.

There is a lot more friends I want to describe but I need to stop right now for continue my revision. I will continue on next article.

To be continue….

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